FOW- Socrates looking for a free ride!

I'm a philosopher and a published writer. I intend to contribute to society by thinking, writing, sharing, and discussing important ideas. Since no one pays people to do that, I need to find a place to live for free.
Look at it this way: You get to support one of the brilliant minds of our time by giving him a place to live. Depending on the quality of my thoughts, and their impact, this could very well be the deal of the century.
Also consider the benefits of having a philosopher in the house. There's no discussion that I can't facilitate and if you have kids I would love helping prevent society from brainwashing them.